Feel so low

I'm putting down my feelings on hear rather on CBC as i feel a bit of a fool as there are people a lot worse off than me. Now where do i begin at the beginning i suppose we have been invited to a surprise 40th birthday party on 31st march we have known and replied yes we would be there just after Christmas so we were all really looking forward to it it's a friend's step mum's party we were at her dad's 50th party in September which was brill ok i hear you asking what's the problem well charlie's mum will be 70 on 5th April but all the family through in Glasgow have decided to have a surprise birthday party for her only it's on the same night as our friend's. So charlie told his sister that we have already accepted the invite to the other party & she goes nuts saying mum's party is more important than some friend's step mother ok that might be the case but to give you an idea charlie's dad died 12 years ago & he hasn't seen 1 sister or his only brother since the funeral. They haven't fell out they just don't keep in touch any time we are in Glasgow we make it our point to visit his mum i have to put a face on as she tolerates me as do i her.Anyway the upshot of it is Charlie is being pressured into going Debbie & Lesley have already said they are not coming with us as they would rather go to the other party so now we are all arguing with one another over this. Charlie told his sister we couldn't really afford to come down to Glasgow as it's so expensive on the train then there's taxi's,drink present ect which really wouldn't have been a problem but Charlie got told on Monday that all over time has stopped so we are going to drop around £300,00 a month & Lesley has moved in with Blair so that's another £200.00 a month which is a lot of money on top of all that we have to pay the rest of our holiday to Majorca by 31st march my pre payment presciption is due on Saturday & DON'T even mention Florida. So have been very down the past couple of weeks cant even be bothered making cards i have lots of new stuff but just cant be a***d.Hope anyone who reads this doesn't feel depressed just reading this post i know reading it back to myself has made me feel worse. Oh & my mum is going back into hospital on 11th April to get her other knee done & don't know if i will get down to see her as Lesley is working & i wont travel on my own (It's a fear i have) Gosh i give up think i will go to bed & stay there for a LONG LONG time. Thanks for looking i may well post again soon then again i might not